“Through the challenges, I resolve my faith.”

Monday’s Mindfulness Mantra

I’ve dubbed this year “Two Thousand KINDteen” and my goal is to increase my mindfulness and, therefore, become a much kinder person than I am today. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a pretty kind person now, but I have a tendency to emotionally react to my environment. This can bring unrest to myself and others unintentionally.

I purchased a book, “The Mindfulness Journal,” which has a writing exercise for each day of the year. Each week has a topic, or subject. The first week was “Daily Gratitude.”

Over the week, each morning, I have reflected on how I have come to arrive to who I am today. Who and what do I have to be grateful for? The list is long and it’s not something that’s foreign to me. In my 20s, I looked to nature and thanked the universe for all that was around me as a method to guide myself closer to wherever I was supposed to be. Most nights, before I go to bed, I always thank the universe for the big things: this life, my family, my home, my mind (think of “Prayer” from “Total Family Massage“).

We’ve only been at this year for one week and I’ve already been tested with my mindfulness. Without going into paltry details, I found myself in that old familiar place of doubt, suspicion, and fear. While my intuition originally felt okay about the situation, many external influences were showing me otherwise. I did my best to just keep breathing, recognize self-defeating thought patterns, and focus on the positive aspects which could stabilize my mood. And while the situation itself became convoluted and confusing, at the very last moment, everything corrected itself.

I realized then that a part of being mindful is having the faith to know that the best possible outcome is likely available if you stick to your guns. This isn’t to say you shouldn’t sit with the negative information and energy around you. Recognize it, think about it, and address it if needed, but then put it away and let the best positive outcome have the space it needs to come through.

I think gratitude helps to strengthen that faith and resolve toward the best outcomes. Knowing what tools and resources I have available to me right now helps me to see that perhaps whatever desired outcome I want may not be the best for me.

I don’t think that’s how it played out for me this time around, but I did recognize that I was under mental duress and I attempted to mindfully adjust myself and maintain a calm and professional demeanor. At the end of the day, I gave myself a B+. I was definitely physically affected by my emotions and so I think I could have released them better. Perhaps I should have take a moment outside to center myself and calm my thoughts. I’ll try that next time. There’s definitely room for improvement within me, but I didn’t make any egregious mistakes during this testing time. I’m proud of myself.

For the future, I’ve decided to write a statement of gratitude I will start every morning off with before I stretch and meditate:

“Thank you, Universe, for the opportunity to live my best life with my loved ones. Through the challenges, I resolve my faith.”